This post definitely shows a very personal side of me.
But i am penning it down cuz i think it's definitely very useful in our not always smooth-sailing life.
I am currently reading a book now called "the secret of letting go"- by Guy Finley
Saw it amongst the other books at hurhur's place and i thought that could do me some help.
Frankly, I think i'm someone who holds on if I really think it's something worth, or something I have put my great effort in it till date.
Be it friendships, relationships, some form of business or whatever it is.
Perhaps It didn't seem like it through the eventful days which i penned down in words and gazillion pics here,
but this year till date hasn't been that well for me.
The most blessing thing I suppose for me now, is to be in love, and yes, to meet hurhur 
(thank you bee <3)
And like they always say, Love plays a huge part in one's life, or Love conquers all.
I didn't really think that way before that, but I couldn't agree more now.
It changes the road ahead, it sure does and no matter how the relationship turns out,
for what its worth, we just have to keep believing that..
we all will and have a someone there, someone right- not just a lover, but a bestfriend and a soulmate, waiting for us.
We just have to keep believing it.
How we got together wasn't as smooth as how a couple gets together,
and it was through some hurdles and problems but I'm glad we walked down the road together.
It would be much much easier if those hurdles would be just things, issues, but nah, it was related to friendships,
and those that we treasured as well.
I kept holding on to the treasured friendship and slowly, i just realised it wasn't the same anymore.
It didn't seem like i was really affected by it on the surface, and only a couple of closer friends knew exactly how was i feeling deep down inside,
but well, it was just sad to know that the friendship didn't turn our stronger than i thought it would be, or hope that it would be.
i suppose we all think that we are right, but i also realised, some things are just not right nor wrong,
People have different perspective on matters, and hence, perhaps some stuff doesn't deem right to one, and if so,
those issues should be put across definitely, to be improved and make sure one does it right the next time.
And the key is, because there is Love in friendships too.
People make mistakes, people don't always agree with one another, people have very different views,
and with a strong friendship just like relationship, in my opinion, that is how friends grow together, agree to disagree,
understanding each other better through happy times and differences.
So that each other would know how to walk down the road together, accommodating willingly with each other's needs,
and knowing what the person likes, and dislike, or what the person is sensitive about.
These are my views, so naturally, i held on but not letting go, expecting one to share the same point of view, but i guess not.
We all can have fun together whenever, but when problem comes, you know who your real friends are.
And perhaps things should just go on its course, there is only so much i can fight for something..
i did and there is only a need to answer to myself for that.
Life still goes on, i don't think people really care whether we are happy or unhappy,
and the more we should brace ourselves up and walk down the road happily and positively.
"Our greatest strength isn't our ability to imagine brighter days ahead, it is that we are empowered -
in every present moment – to effortlessly dismiss any dark thought or feeling that, left unattended,
diminishes our happiness"
think this book does help in opening your mind, letting you have a different perspective in life.
Happiness or how are we feeling happy every day is actually all in our minds, just how we look at things today.
Nothing can change that, or allow that, only us, ourselves.
I'm still reading, but i can already feel that i am starting to master the skill of letting go each bit of unhappiness effortlessly,
yes, the key is effortlessly.
Thanks bee for being there, and to those friends who were as well, you know who you are. <3
And I seriously believe i can do that, a lil pathetic to know i need a book to understand myself better,
but well, if it helps, why not right?! Geez.
***
Nuff reflections of mine and on a side note, I just got a mailer from my NUS friend, Nalinah, (my hall mate back then),
asking if i wanna attend this fun-filled healthy event - HYPERJIVE (Mega 3 hours fitness event) with all my other friends!
I'm so glad that it's opened out to public because i always love going for such events whereby you can do all these activities (and not just eating, drinking, and movie) with your friends!!
I can still remember i used to go Singapore workout at the field with my parents back then and do the marching of feet action with clapping and "five five five" down, hahaha!
Well, a movie ticket cost about $10 already, so why not just replace the movie ticket for this event with friends or family together?!
Plus it's a healthy one, and i am sure you will feel good after the event cuz you exercise,
and it will be hilarious with the poses for your whole gang if most don't do kickboxing and yoga, but i'm sure it's gonna be awesome fun!!
NUS events are always super hype up, as what I have attended back then!
And you get to meet many NUS Hunks and babes. ;p
And oh yes, this event is accompanied with attractive goodies bags too!
Each goodie bag is worth $200, as what i know, items like:
-Shokubutsu items
- Ganier facial items
- Instant noodles
- SHAPE magazine
- Amore Beach bag
- Vouchers (frolick, botak jones, deuter, massage at sports physio etc etc)
- Lucky draw chance whereby there are 10 sets of Adidas water bottles and Iphone Sports Armbands are for grabs!!
- or participate in any of the exercise event and stand to win SKI 360 free passes & Jack's Place vouchers.
Any friends wanna go?!
It's this Sat! 
For public, you are welcome!
You can contact my friends at:
Nalinah @ 82391685 / Fangli @ 98581643
Email: [email protected]
Sign up online if you want too!
Http://nusaerobics.wordpress.com
Hi beatrice, what a paragraph you have written there. You really expressed your thoughts so well and I find myself in an almost similar situation to yours. I would like to encourage you to let go of the unhappiness that you may be feeling. People come and go in our life, it is those who stay that matters.
<3
thank you for dropping a comment and for the encouragement, it means a lot to me! <3
totally feel you! got so disappointed in friendships after so many ‘events’ this year. but cheer up babe! i believe you got a lot of love from all your readers here too!
Bee I’ve read ur blog since I’m sec 3 hmm! now I’m a J2 student! hhow time flies. I envy you much! Right now I’m struggling with A’s at TJC and life’s really tough. Ur pictures brighten up my life
And most importantly, I see you enjoying your life. Keep up the interesting post kay! you are my favourite blogger yay! 
really?! so cool and nice to know that! sec 3 till j2!
you are doing great too then to be able to go TJC! just a bit more to get into a local Uni of your choice! jiayou! if you need advice on uni, you can let me know too! thanks dear, for brightening up my day! <3
I have been reading your blog for a few years too! Yes, I really look forward to reading your blogs, seeing beautiful pictures and posts that always complete my day. And now, I am going to get the book also! I believe one day mine will come also and can have the courage to handle it like you do. Jia you! And please blog often like now
Thank you bea!
This relates sooooo well. Love the post!!! <3
hi beatrice,
chanced upon your blog through mutual mutual friends cos i thought you were really really pretty and also through love bonito of course
this blog post you had really hit a spot in my heart. i always tend to overthink about lotsa stuff but seeing the paragraph you wrote made me think in a different way. its true that whilst in the past i would think being happy is the ultimate key, but its actually the unhappiness you have to let go and the bad experiences that you learn from them that ultimately make you stronger. thank you for this 
)) and the the book sounds good! maybe i should get it too hehe :p
yeah same here, i tend to over think stuff, good and bad in some situations. learning to better handle the negative issues and life can be so much more
) *hugs!
Jiayou Bea. I love your thoughtful posts, somehow it can relate to your readers and letting them know that they are not going through times like this alone! Looking forward to seeing more of your blog posts! <3
bf and friendship…? Hmmm..
Thanks for the awesome, heartfelt post! It’s really refreshing. I remember you blogged before about being satisfied as a single…can you talk more about this? I’m really struggling right now after a break up. Would really hope to hear how you live so happily before you got attached.
hi dear, im sorry to hear that.. but i was in your shoes before..
it definitely wasn’t easy, especially at the start, whereby you would want to see e person everytime, wanting to message/call, always looking at your phone hoping to get a message to turn things around etc, or constantly see his page to see what is he doing etc. it will go on for a while and its always a torture to do that, especially when there is any news, your heart will totally skip a beat.
i didn’t take just a while to get over, and i wanted to so much to get back together and thought it would be better even though we knew there were problems in between us, or if one has lost interest or so forth. tt time i thought, what more can be worst than a breakup, so hoping to get back to see how things go, but i knew things just dont work out and we don’t suit each other, but its just us, that put in so much feelings for the person already.
many a time i felt the urge to do all those above, i will talk to my friends, they will hear, or i will talk to my mom, i know you will hear the usual sentences- try to keep busy, hes not worth it, you deserve better etc”, we can’t take it and truly understand the meaning but as time goes by, these sentences are simple but yet full of true meanings you realised. just talk to your friends, mom or whoever, keep listening to all these, slowly understand them, and most importantly control. Cuz with those emotions, its so hard to control our actions, but you just have to control. it will get better each day, and after a while, you wouldn’t need as much energy or determination to control, and gradually its let go.
cuz what i believe is that, there are just two genders in the whole wide world- female or male. this guy let us go, there are just so many other guys out there. i know in your mind, u might also feel the same way as me back then that, “we can’t find this same guy anymore elsewhere, he’s the one i really love.” but when you really move on, like i am now, you will know how silly of us to think that way, and foolish in some sense, cuz the next guy will prove to you that you own the happiness and only you yourself can fight for that happiness. and with you moving on next time, you will then think, if i didn’t have that breakup, i wouldn’t even meet this guy now! thank goodness…
for a start, you might want to try my way, control, dont message, call or whatever. if its needed, delete what is too apparent about him around, like his stuff or what etc. just make sure there is no sight of anything that belongs to him or so. AND it is understandable that we will blame ourselves about the breakup, thinking that we could have improved and prevent the breakup, but thats NOT TRUE. we might make mistakes, but they do too right? we might make mistakes, but if they love us, we will share thru the good and bad, and learn from those and make sure we grow, improve ourselves than to just give up. they are not perfect guys too, but we accommodate to some stuff that are not right or wrong, but are not what we expected as well, and we didn’t give up. we might make mistakes cuz we love them so much, but we again, love them enough to find the right balance to make sure it works, but they chose to gave up.. not worth it for all the effort for someone like this. might as well keep the improved self for a better someone next time..
hugs* trust me, time will heal it, and you will be much more happier than u are in the past relationship.
Hey Beatrice!
Firstly just like most of them out there I’ve been a random reader of your blog as well.
Love your blog posts.
I’ve just been through a break up as well, been like about 4mths and yep am having a pretty tough time moving on as well. To have him to break up the relationship the fact that he has been happily moving on breaks me apart. However seriously what you replied is exactly how i feel as well the part where you mention “you would want to see e person every time, wanting to message/call, always looking at your phone hoping to get a message to turn things around etc or constantly see his page to see what is he doing etc” and not only that I’ve wanted so much to get back to him as well for him to give me another chance. Recently I’ve even tried msgin and been wanting to talk to him cos its weird how i feel he is the only one that i could comfortably talk to about anythin. Where else i’ve only gotten replies that he has been occupied or busy with work, which then makes me feel all sucky and regretful for msgin him the first place. I’ve told myself to let go slowly but every time i try i just keep falling back. Just like you mention I’ve tried talking to friends and my mum as well and they did gave the exact same reply you mention. Am not lying or faking it here but i relate to exactly what you replied as well. The fact that i just started takin my degree and am pretty much alone ain’t helping me much as well. Thought studying and all would keep me occupied at least but am afraid its affecting it. I keep askin myself how much longer and i know time heals but i realise that it will only heal when you’re in the next relationship or when you’ve met the ‘one’ meanwhile its just tough doing it alone. I pretty much don’t foresee myself meeting anyone new or being in a r/s. Though he ain’t perfect as well but i keep getting the tendency to compare guys with him and i can’t seem to relate to any other guys..
i know life has to still move on and there is so much more to life but haiss…
A sorry for typin such a long reply apologies as i just kinda relate to what you replied and thought of sharin as well. Thanks Beatrice
no worries dear! i love reading long comments actually! means a lot with a lot of thoughts as well.
oh dear, breakup is never easy, i can totally comprehend how you feel… but im glad you have alr sorted things out and you are really strong! 4 months and alr figured all these thought. jiayou! you can do it, i am sure u can find someone much better in a different way. 
Hi beatrice, thanks for the very thoughtful reply. Sorry I took a while to let you know I’ve read your comment…needed some time. And yes, like Val, I resonate with what you said. Just today, I deleted his number from my hp. To me, it’s another step toward moving on and I’m glad about it. I will control and remember that it’s not worth it to get back. Actually today he emailed me to meet up. It’s been 3-4 months since we broke up (I initiated)…and reading your comment was a very good reminder for me to stay firm in my decision.
Thank you for sharing so openly your past experience…it has given me strength to do the right thing.
Hi Beatrice!
I always enjoy reading all your post, it’s so easy to relate with your thoughts.
加油! It’s just how life teaches us to grow and to experience different things in life.
We meet different people & expereince different things at different stage of life, and the saying goes “Don’t be bother or be upset over the past, there’s a reason why they didn’t make it with you into the future.”
Cheer up and take care!
Yours Sincerely,
Crystal
thank you crystal!
i will keep in mind what you told me here! *hugs!
hi beatrice!
this post of urs couldnt have been more timely. i’m recently gg thru some tough spots with my ‘friends’. all along these so-called friends of mine couldnt b happy for me whenever i go thru rough patches with my bf and made it thru. they always hav nt been supportive of him n i. now im finally done with these ‘friends’ and these lines from ur entry “We all can have fun together whenever, but when problem comes, you know who your real friends are.
And perhaps things should just go on its course, there is only so much i can fight for something..
i did and there is only a need to answer to myself for that.” it couldnt have expressed my thoughts and feelings much better. quoted u in my fb.
thks for this wonderfully written post n for untangling my knots in my heart. i am so gg to find that book and further empower myself with letting go. it’s so true that there is so much happening ard us everyday and true happiness is in letting go of things causing us unhappiness instead of lamenting one’s misfortune.
have been following ur blog for sometime n this is my first time commenting. i’m so happy to see ur happy photos of u n hurhur. u deserve all e happiness u’ve been getting, jus like how everyone deserves their own happiness. but happiness doesnt jus falls into our laps, it’s from our own hard work in fighting for it n knowing whn to let go!
hi dear, thank you for sharing too! it feels really nice to be sharing the same thoughts as someone and it’s very encouraging too! lets keep moving forward and keep fighting!
) *hugs!
Hi Beatrice!
I really love the way you blog. It’s very interesting (from fashion, travel and now some inspirational insights). I bet you’re a very versatile person. Keep it up!
thank you!!! you made me smile!!
D
yes its a start! jiayou!! *hugs!!
))